Sarcasm

21st October 2012 - Malaysia Airports to Close Inner Lane at Miri Airport

Submitted by popui on Sun, 2012-10-21 11:42. :: Eyes on Miri | News & Events | Rants | Sarcasm | Tourism


MAB to close inner lane at Miri Airport

MIRI: Malaysian Airports Bhd (MAB) Miri has issued a notice that the inner lane at Miri Airport will be closed to the public from tomorrow (Oct 22).

MAB announced in a notice that due to safety reasons, the inner lane at Miri Airport would be closed to the public (to drop off or pick up passengers) except to ambulances, fire engines, police, airport taxis, and VIPs (with prior approval from
airport authority).

Source



My take:

What was puzzling is that this lane had actually closed yesterday (20th October), not 22nd October. I know, I was there.

I highly disapprove of this move.

Was there a particularly good reason to close the inner lane? What was the reason? Is it to facilitate VIPs? What other reason? For safety? From safety risk? Roof collapse? If so, then why allow ambulances and taxis, police and even VIPs?

The airport originally had a VIP TERMINAL. After the redesign, now it only has a VIP Lounge. This is a poor design, as that would mean if this was true that it was due to facilitate VIPs, then the whole airport would have to be basically shut down just for them. You don't see LAX or JFK airport shutting down just because the President of United States wants to land there, the public continues to use the airport, the President just uses the VIP terminal..

Back to the Miri Airport. The outer lane is too small for use, it will be congested. It's not rocket science; you have two lanes, and you cut down one lane,you're left with one. That's 50% drop in efficiency. On top of that the airport is built for the public (that's us) to load & unload passengers and their baggage using the inner lane, so closing the lane not only causes inconvenience to the public, it is a totally unfair move to the public.

To top it of; it's the rainy season. Without use of the roof, they are willing to want to inconvenience the public to walk and move pick up their baggage in the rain by disallowing the use of the inner lane roof?

Also, and this is the most important : what are we paying the airport tax for?


The Trick to Parking in Miri

Submitted by eyeonmiri on Wed, 2012-08-29 11:11. :: Eyes on Miri | Automotive | Rants | Sarcasm


This happened to me lately; I just got into the multi-story carpark, didn't even park, got a phone call to do something and so I had to go out - this all happened within a minute, but I still get charged for "parking" in the multistory carpark. Seriously? They didn't even have the 15 minutes buffer like in shopping complexes.

So this got me thinking; here's some tricks to parking in Miri. I think I got it all sorted out:

1. Wait by your car in a parking spot. As the parking attendants come by, just wave to them. You will not get charged for PARKING. Just think of it like using the Force in Star Wars, except that you need to be by your vehicle all the time. As you would expect, this works EXTREMELY WELL if you park directly in front of your place of work where you will be always by your vehicle. This is the trick to forever free parking.

2. Put up your wipers. This apparently indicates that you will be parking for a while, so this lets you off the hook too (not guaranteed to work, but that is a 50% thing)

3. Wait till it rains. Free parking for all!

4. Use a coupon like you should. But park like an asshat taking up 2 spaces. This should be worth it because you DON'T get a fine. After all, taking up 2 spaces for the price of one, right? Win. Because they don't fine you for parking like a dimwit.

5. Drive into the multi-story carpark. Don't get a ticket and tell them you are just going in there to wait for children to come after school. Because the multi-story carpark shades you from the sun and is an awesome place to be. Then PARK INSIDE there until your children comes along, and then leave. Cost? Free! There is a school near the multi-story car park and I see parents do this all the time. They just enter and go out for free. Totally different scenario than the one I experienced above.

Things you shouldn't do:

1. Park properly and THEN walk over to buy a parking coupon. Because this will guarantee you will get a fine when you come back with the coupon in your hand. What you SHOULD do is, park your car blocking half the road in front of the parking coupon hut and then buy the coupon. No, seriously.

2. Park properly, and then get the date / time wrong, it's a common occurance. So now your fine will cost MORE than those who didn't leave a coupon, because you just wasted a coupon, sucker.

3. Go into the multi-story carpark, get a ticket, don't park, and then get out again. Because no matter what, just by driving into the multi-story carpark infers you have parked. Don't try to explain. Ticket, entered, and therefore, parked. A fee shall be incurred.

Man Jumps from Emergency Exit of Moving Airbus - While Still on Ground (Of Course)

Submitted by eyeonmiri on Sat, 2012-08-04 11:17. :: Eyes on Miri | News & Events | Sarcasm | Special interests | Tourism



Man Jumps from Moving Plane

Like stuff in movies, or news we read in the funny columns usually involving other countries, a man jumped out the emergency exit of an AirAsia aircraft while it was still taxiing on the ground at about 7pm last night (3rd August, 2012). This action caused that flight and several other flights at Miri Airport to be delayed for the rest of the night.

Apparently, he's an off-duty crew member of the airline, so surely if it's anyone who can operate the emergency exit, it's him.

Here's a nice graphic showing how he went about opening the exit, mustache and all:

See also:

- similar news of a monk opening the emergency exit - because he wanted fresh air, and

- Vietnamese man opens door out of curiosity,

- another man thought he was opening the window

- obviously very impatient man next to crying child opens emergency exit,

..and much closer to last night's situation, Fed-Up Flight Attendant Makes Sliding Exit

Source: Borneo Post

August 3rd 2010 - Foreigners warned over RON95 fuel ruling

Submitted by eyeonmiri on Tue, 2010-08-03 11:24. :: Eyes on Miri | News & Events | Sarcasm | Special interests


Foreigners warned over RON95 fuel ruling

Foreigners who blatantly flout the ruling that bars foreign-registered vehicles from buying subsidised RON95 petrol can be fined up to RM100,000 or face three years imprisonment.

Foreigners, especially in border states such as Kedah, Perlis, Johor, Kelantan and Sabah and Sarawak, to follow the ruling and respect the country’s laws.

More at The Star

Do you hear that noise? It's the Bruneians laughing. This certainly doesn't apply to them, they have much cheaper petrol than us. If it's anything it should be the other way round for us here in Miri.

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